How kookaburra wings in Florida changed my entire view on travel

Years ago, I visited an Outback Steakhouse in Orlando, Florida. It had a friendly-looking kangaroo logo and promised meat, an irresistible combo to a hungry carnivorous Aussie in a strange, strange land. Alongside the steaks, the menu featured shrimp on the barbie (of course) as well as kookaburra wings (tasted like chicken), Sydney Shrooms (tempted) and a battered, deep-fried "delicacy" called The Bloomin' Onion.

More cringe than authentic, Outback Steakhouse almost, but not quite, totally failed to capture the vibe of a regional Australian pub. But I was enjoying the steak too much to care, and, as I was heading to Walt Disney World for the fireworks, I was ruing not having a crack at the shrooms.

Authenticity, like nostalgia, is not what it used to be. Despite this, the adjective is increasingly applied to travel offerings. Focus groups hooked up to dopamine-measuring gizmos must have suggested this is what we want. It seems "Been there, done that, got the T-shirt" (and maybe the snow globe if Mother's Day is approaching) just doesn't cut the Dijon anymore.

In the Trumpian era, when words like "truth" and "facts" (not to mention "corruption") have been redefined, is "authentic" still a thing? Or has it gone the way of "luxury" and "upgrade" in the travel lexicon, and lost all - or most of - its meaning?

Is it even reasonable to expect authenticity in a globalised, modern world? Should people clinging to traditional lifestyles, who present cultural performances for tourists, have to do without modern medicine, the internet and The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

Travellers desire the exotic. And we think that means "authentic". Or immersive. Or experiential. Or enriching. Or pristine. Or genuine. Or whatever synonym advertisers think will tickle our collective fancies. The chief KPI for every copywriter and his thesaurus is to reinvent the spiel.

We are lured by marketing that proclaims a destination as "untouched by tourism" or "off the beaten track" or "like Kuta 30 years ago". Travel promotion has become irony-free.

The authentic travel experience is like Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle - if we observe it, we change it. Once it is reproduced for the benefit of paying tourists, authenticity disappears in a quantum leap reality check.

Authenticity often comes at a price, and not just the loading you pay for immersive, enriching, untouched, pristine, genuine, off-the-beaten-track, experiential experiences. For example, riding elephants is an authentic part of some cultures. While we might like to think we've evolved beyond this and see it as abuse, those for whom this is heritage are offended by our holier-than-thou attitude. Not as offended as the elephants, but still ...

One aspect of travel that remains reasonably authentic is dining. The rule that has stood the test of time is to eat where locals eat. Pick the street vendor in Bangkok who can't speak American. Join the longest queue for dumplings in Osaka. Take a macaron-making class with a French chef in a Loire Valley chateau. Book lunch in a small Tuscan winery. Find a braai in Johannesburg where the zebra is served with satirical grill stripes. Order pho in a Hanoi laneway and slurp down the mystery protein. Belly up to tapas of txangurro and merlu koskera and wash it down with txakoli in a Bilbao back alley.