Pack up your troubles with these easy fixes for common cruise complaints

It's not all smooth sailing, but with a bit of planning, you can work around many of these on-ship issues.

I know far more than I care to about Barb and Chip, the American couple who cruised in the cabin next to mine on a recent voyage in Europe. Their loud voices broadcast every detail of the day's activities, including updates on their morning bowel movements.

The fix: Avoid booking an interconnecting cabin unless you really need it, says Holly Velardo, director of HollyDay Travel. "Noise tends to travel more easily between these rooms," she says.

If it feels awkward to approach the neighbours directly, voice your concerns to the guest services team. They can politely ask the guests to keep it down, and if that fails, they might be able to move you.

Too small, too far from the elevators, too close to the elevators ... there are many reasons a cabin might fall short. There's nothing like that sinking feeling of wanting to jump ship the first time you see your cabin.

The fix: Spend time choosing the right cabin so you won't waste valuable holiday time unpacking twice. Working with a travel agent or doing your research beforehand is key to avoiding disappointment once onboard, says Adrian Tassone, the Cruise and Travel Guy, reviewer and YouTuber.

"If your cruise digs are just not doing it for you, ask about an onboard upgrade, or start playing bingo," Tassone says. "A common top prize is an upgrade to a luxurious suite."

The price of a city-based shore excursion can sometimes exceed $US200 ($294) per person. For an exclusive small-group or multi-stop tour, you could be asked to fork out upwards of $US350. That's going to strain most family budgets.

The fix: Book similar tours to the ones offered by the ship through an independent shore-excursion provider at a lower price. In some cities, you can even DIY. The Italian port of Civitavecchia, for example, is a one-hour train ride from Rome. Just be aware that unless you're on one of the ship's tours, the ship won't wait for you if you're late.

In ports that don't have a suitable harbour big enough or deep enough for modern cruise ships, passengers have to be ferried to shore in tender boats. Long waits can really cut into time ashore, especially when contending with rush hour on a mega ship.

The fix: Regular cruisers can benefit from their loyalty status to get off on the first tender boats, says Velardo. Those with more elite status will be offered priority transfers and, in some cases, will even be escorted by the concierge. For everyone else, set the wake-up alarm early to be one of the first off the ship and onto the transfer, or book a ship-sponsored shore excursion with an early start time.

You're all set for a relaxing day by the pool, frozen cocktail in one hand, a murder-mystery book in the other. Heading to the deck, you see the chairs are already occupied with passengers, or their strategically placed towels, magazines and sunscreen.

The fix: "Deck chair hogs are a breed unto themselves," says Tassone. "Getting up early is your best bet, but if you're late to the party, then keep an eye on any chairs being reserved with personal belongings."

Tassone says if nobody returns in 30 minutes, approach the crew to have the items removed. Chair policy enforcement usually comes down to seeking help from crew.

You entrusted your suitcase to the ship's baggage handlers, and now it's time to change for dinner but your bag is nowhere to be found. While there is statistically less chance of a cruise ship losing your luggage than an airline, it does happen.

The fix: To begin with, never put anything important such as passports, house keys, medications or credit cards in your checked luggage. Next, make sure all bags are securely tagged, showing your name and cabin number. Pop in an AirTag, if you have one. If your bag hasn't shown up by 8pm on the first night, ask to go shopping on the house in the ship's boutique.

Whether it's motion sickness, an upset stomach or a dreaded case of COVID-19, it really is the pits to get sick on holiday. Cruise passengers are at risk of all sorts of contagious bugs, and while there is usually an onboard doctor to consult, the service can be costly.

The fix: "Bring a disinfectant spray like Glen 20 and spray it into the air-conditioning ducts in your room to reduce airborne germs," says Velardo. "I also recommend choosing a cabin mid-ship and on a lower deck [if you are prone to seasickness]."

Frequent travellers know a well-packed medical kit should include emergency remedies for diarrhea, cuts, allergic reactions, heartburn, sunburn, gastro infections and nausea.

I've never missed a cruise ship sailaway, but several times I've watched as panicked latecomers bolt down the pier as the ship pulls away from the dock. Too late for the vessel to turn back now, the cruisers have been left behind in port.

The fix: "You made the worst mistake a cruiser can make," Tassone says. "Always allow enough buffer time to return to a ship before its scheduled departure."

Make sure you carry the port agent's information with you every time you disembark. This can usually be found in the daily program. The agent can help you get to the ship's next port of call.

Most cruise lines know that well-fed passengers are happy passengers, so they go above and beyond to deliver. For some, it still doesn't hit the spot. Too spicy, not spicy enough, overcooked or undercooked; food you don't like can ruin a trip.

The fix: "If you have a craving for something not on the menu, ask," says Velardo. "Many cruise kitchens are more flexible than you might think and love to cater to special requests." Velardo also recommends befriending the wait staff and chefs right from the start. That way, they'll remember your preferences and can surprise you with personalised dishes that aren't on the menu.

Many cruise lines add automatic gratuity charges of up to $US25 per person per day to passengers' onboard accounts, which can come as a shock to first-time cruisers. Aussies tend to question why we should have to pay extra in tips.

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The fix: "Fortunately for Australians, cruise lines understand that ours is not a tipping culture," Tassone says. "For this reason, most do not charge daily gratuities on voyages departing from Australian cities."

Overseas, Tassone says that you can head to the reception desk and ask the crew to remove the daily gratuity charge.